3 New Ways to Practice Gratitude

by Shana Montesol Johnson

Hello from Arlington, Virginia, just outside of Washington, DC in the USA! As some of you may know, I relocated here a few months ago with my family, after spending 13 wonderful years in Asia. It’s been a big move for myself, my husband and two daughters, and my coaching and leadership development business! While “the transition” is still underway – and I will soon share some of my reflections and lessons learned on transition – there is much to be grateful for, particularly at this time of year. It is Thanksgiving here in the USA, and what better time to think about thankfulness? See my tips below on 3 New Ways to Practice Gratitude.

Here’s a video summary of this article, which you can watch by clicking below:

 

3 New Ways to Practice Gratitude

 

Gratitude has long been a topic of fascination for me. I’ve geeked out on the benefits of gratitude – better sleep, lower blood pressure, less depression, more joy, and even better attainment of goals. I’ve asked my kids so often at the dinner table, “What are you grateful for?” that now they ask me what the best part of my day was. (Parenting win!) I’ve also been known to invite my coaching clients to keep gratitude lists or gratitude journals.

Yet it’s also easy to stagnate in a gratitude practice. We start to recite by rote what we are thankful for: family, friends, health, job, a roof over our heads. The same answer every time. We take these for granted, which is pretty much the opposite of gratitude.

Since it can be helpful to mix it up, here are 3 new ways to practice gratitude:

  1. Silver Linings Challenge. Think of something you have been complaining about, or something that is making you unhappy. What can you appreciate about it? What is good about this situation?When I lived in the Philippines, I often found myself spending hours in the car, stuck in Manila’s legendary traffic. The silver lining? It gave me ample opportunity to listen to audiobooks and podcasts. Thanks to the epic traffic, I was exposed to numerous books, interviews, and articles that I otherwise would not have taken the time to listen to or read – and I learned a ton.This practice is not about minimizing or denying difficulty, but making room for appreciation. And the more we tap into gratitude, the more our perspective begins to shift, and that annoying person/situation has less power over us.
  2. Advance Appreciation. We usually express gratitude for what others have done for us, or for good things that have come into our lives. How about giving thanks for things that haven’t happened yet? Surely this will shift our mindset into gratitude.For example, earlier this year, there was a lot of uncertainty (and accompanying stress and anxiety) around my family’s move to the US. Where would we live? Would we find a house that we liked and could afford in a good location? What schools would our kids attend? I started giving thanks for our future house, neighborhood, and schools – before we knew the answers to any of those questions. (This practice didn’t erase my stress and anxiety altogether, but it did help me focus on the positive.) And now, months later, they have all appeared.
  3. Take Note of the Trivial. When we are asked what we are thankful for, we tend to think of the big things – family, friends, job, health, freedom – but what about the little things? Making a practice of noting 5 or 10 seemingly trivial things that we are thankful for can help shift our radar towards more things to appreciate in our daily lives. Here are some of mine:

the smell of coffee brewing

the stranger who held the door open for me as I entered the store

sleeping in on a Saturday morning

a pen that writes smoothly

Post It notes in a rainbow of colors (ok, you can tell I’m into office supplies!)

finding one last mini Twix bar in the leftover Halloween candy

my favorite pair of shoes

my daughter offering to set the table without being asked

a beautiful sunset

technology that enables me to stay connected with family, friends, and clients (this one is actually not trivial!)

And here’s a bonus super-easy Gratitude Practice:

Password Prompt. Set your password (for your email, computer or phone, bank account, etc.) to a word or phrase that will remind you to take a moment to be grateful. It’s a stealthy way to get more thankfulness into your daily life.

I invite you to try just one of these practices, and see what comes up. Let me know if you do! Feel free to drop me an email at shana (at) developmentcrossroads (dot) com.

Did you like this? Share it:

{ 0 comments }

This article originally appeared on Devex.com. I wanted to be sure that the Development Crossroads community had access to it as well.

We’ve all heard how important networking is to the success of our career. But how can you network if you’re based in the field, far away from key decision-makers or unable to attend organized regional networking events like this week’s Devex Career Forum in Manila?

Here are nine tips for those of you who are based in the field, or residing far from where your contacts (actual or desired) are located:

1. Reframe how you define networking

Some people think of networking as meeting new people, attending networking receptions and collecting business cards. I define networking as “the process of building and maintaining relationships with people who can help you, and whom you can help.”

Seen this way, networking can be done from any location — just because you aren’t physically present to attend your alumni networking breakfast doesn’t mean you can’t build and maintain your relationships with people in your network in other ways.

2. Nurture your current network

Since networking is not only about acquiring new contacts, it’s equally important (if not more important!) to cultivate relationships with people you already know, both inside and outside of your organization. Ask yourself, “Who are the people I’d like to keep in touch with back at the home office, back in my home country and/or in key spots elsewhere (such as the country I’d like to work in next)?”

Make a list of names, and decide how you’ll keep in contact, and how often. Tailor your approach to the preferences of others (e.g., some people prefer a quick email update, while others spend more time on social networking sites) as well as what will be doable (and not overwhelming) for you.

3. Grow your network

Give some thought to the kinds of people you would like to have in your network (regardless of location). How can you meet them from a distance? You could seek email introductions from mutual contacts or colleagues. You could follow international development professionals on Twitter, and interact with them there. If someone you’d like to meet writes a blog, by all means read it regularly, comment thoughtfully, and even offer to write a guest post.

4. Don’t underestimate the power of Skype

You may be wondering, “What good is an email introduction to a new contact if I can’t hop on the subway to meet them for an informational interview?” Well, just because you’re based in Jakarta doesn’t mean you can’t have coffees or informational interviews with people in DC (or Geneva or London or Manila). After all, the people who would be willing to have a coffee with you or give you an informational interview are probably just as willing to have a Skype call with you.

Don’t be shy about asking. Just be kind about time zones and schedule it during a reasonable time of day for them (even if that means that you are getting up early or staying up late to make it happen). And if you have the bandwidth for Skype video, it really is almost as good as being there in person.

5. Network locally

While it’s important to expand and nurture your network in other geographic locations, don’t neglect the people who are all around you. Some of the strongest personal and professional relationships among global development professionals are forged in the field. Get to know your colleagues and locally based professional contacts. Spend time with them outside of work, and find out how you can be helpful to them.

And push beyond the expat bubble to get to know the resident global development leaders — both existing and up-and-coming. You never know who will go on to become the minister of health or lead that NGO you’ve always wanted to work with.

6. Make the most of home leave

Home leave is a great time to reconnect with family and friends. It’s also a great opportunity to refresh your professional contacts and reach out to new people in your field.

If you have plans to travel to or near a place where your contacts — or prospective contacts — are, be sure to schedule time to see them. A side trip to a key city not on your family’s home leave itinerary may prove worthwhile, even for just one day. Seeing someone face-to-face, even if it’s just once a year or every couple years, can help maintain a relationship. Plus, your contacts may be more apt to make time in their always-busy schedules to see you when they know you are only in town for a short period of time.

7. Take advantage of work-related travel

If your work brings you to a new city or town for a few days or weeks, use that as an opportunity to build your network. Search through your Devex connections, LinkedIn contacts or Facebook friends by geography to find out (or remind yourself) who lives in that area. Consult your alumni network database to see if fellow grads live in the place you’ll be visiting. Reach out to contacts, existing and new, to arrange one-on-one lunches, coffees or dinners.

Or gather a whole group together for a meetup. If your contacts don’t already know each other, all the better — they’ll get to meet or catch up with you while expanding their own network at the same time.

8. Consider a self-financed networking fund

Maybe your organization doesn’t pay for you to take home leave, and you don’t have work-related travel that would give you the opportunity to connect with key people. Consider spending some of your own money to network, whether that means paying your own way to a conference or buying a plane ticket to see people face-to-face. Think of it as an investment in your career.

9. Keep asking, “How can I be helpful to the people in my network?”

Just because you are far away from your contacts does not mean you can’t help them. Think about how you can leverage your geographic location for the benefit of your network. You probably have access to information or insights from the field that your contacts back at headquarters or your home country lack. Share these. Be generous. Be proactive. This is what will make your network strong.

If you are based in the field, what have been some ways you’ve found effective in networking at a distance? If you’re based at HQ or your home country, what have you observed about the networking approaches of your colleagues in the field? Please share these in the comments section below.

Did you like this? Share it:

{ 5 comments }

New Year’s Reset

Kung Hei Fat Choi! Happy (Chinese) New Year! I find that, living in Asia, welcoming the lunar new year is a bit of a relief. It’s a time of year when I actually have some breathing room to reflect on the past year and plan for the year to come. My personal family tradition is […]

Read the full article →

New Year’s Resolution: To De-stress

The Guardian.com’s Global Development Professionals Network recently ran a Q&A series on New Year’s resolutions. They asked me to participate by sharing my response to a question posed by a human rights worker. The original post can be found here. Q: Last year I was overworked and stressed out by my job. My work can also […]

Read the full article →

You had me at ‘Hello’: How to introduce yourself at a networking event

This article originally appeared on Devex.com. I wanted to be sure that the Development Crossroads community had access to it as well.   “It’s great to meet you,” says the stranger at a networking event, smiling broadly as she shakes your hand. “Tell me about what you do.” Uh oh. Now what? Do you: a) […]

Read the full article →

The 3 Reasons to Get a Life (Outside of Work)

Sure, it’s important to be happy at work. But if we look to our jobs as our sole source of satisfaction and joy, we can end up very unhappy indeed. In this installment of the Happy at Work blog series, I share 3 reasons why getting a life outside of work can help you be […]

Read the full article →

To Succeed at Work, Channel Your Inner Diva

What do you need to perform, work and/or be at your best? A few years ago, pop singer Jennifer Lopez made news for reportedly insisting that the hotel suites where she stayed while touring conform to the following demands: bedsheets must be Egyptian cotton with a thread count of at least 250, walls and furnishings […]

Read the full article →

Happy at Work

Happy International Day of Happiness! Today (March 20, 2013) is the first-ever International Day of Happiness, as proclaimed by the United Nations last year, “recognizing the relevance of happiness and well-being as universal goals and aspirations in the lives of human beings around the world.” It makes me happy that there is now such a […]

Read the full article →

6 Reasons You Should Dump Your New Year’s Resolutions (and 3 Steps to a Great 2013)

Did you start off 2013 with some New Year’s resolutions? And how are those working out for you? If your resolutions have crashed and burned, fizzled out, or never got off the ground, you are not alone. Research shows that 88% of New Year’s resolutions fail. What is wrong with New Year’s resolutions? Here are […]

Read the full article →

The End-of-Year Free Pass

You’ve been crazy busy this year with challenging work projects, plenty of travel, and family obligations. You’ve barely kept your head above water, so you’ve probably had to say No to certain non-urgent tasks– like keeping in touch with your professional contacts. You know you “should” do this, that it’s good for your career and […]

Read the full article →