Change has been on my mind lately. I am in the midst of a change, having moved from Asia to the USA nine months ago. My coaching clients – from those in international organizations to those in private sector start-ups – are also grappling with change. Some have landed big promotions and are making sense of new roles and taking on new identities. Others are contemplating making a change in role or employer or location, unsure of whether it’s the time to take a risk, and if so, what path to chart.
Even the weather seems to be struggling with change. Here in the Washington, DC area, spring is sure taking its sweet time in arriving. It’s as if winter refuses to give up its hold on us. The calendar may indicate that it is officially spring, but the chilly temperatures tell a different story.
Washington’s famous cherry blossoms seem confused this year — they made an unusually late appearance. When I tried to view them last month during the Cherry Blossom Festival, they were mere buds on trees. Ten days later, I made a determined return to the Tidal Basin, and hastily snapped this picture. Despite the beautiful blooms, snow was forecast for the next day.
We are in an in-between stage where it’s not really winter anymore, but spring has not fully arrived.
It reminds me of the “Neutral Zone” stage of personal and organizational change – that state of limbo where the old is gone but the new hasn’t become fully operational. The old ways don’t work anymore, yet the new ways don’t feel right, either. Change expert William Bridges called it a “nowhere between two somewheres.”
Have you found yourself in the neutral zone before? Maybe you finally landed that big promotion at work, and despite the external signs – you’ve taken on the new responsibilities, you’re leading a new team, you have new business cards with your snazzy new title – you just don’t feel fully at home yet in your new role.
The neutral zone is a state of limbo, where it feels there is nothing to hold onto. It can be very disorienting, uncomfortable, and perplexing.
In my work coaching clients, and in my own life, I’ve found it’s helpful just to know there is such a thing as the neutral zone. Over the past several months, I’ve been acclimating back to life in the US after living abroad for 13 years. The external changes are there – a new address, new clients, new neighbors – yet there is still an internal shift that takes longer to complete. Knowing this has helped me to adjust my expectations and go easy on myself.
On the days when I feel like the hashtag I made up (#immigrantinmyowncountry) or when it feels like I haven’t quite landed yet (even though I’ve been here for months), I try to remind myself that I’m in the midst of a neutral zone. It’s okay – even expected – to feel that way.
The upside? The neutral zone is a time of growth. It’s the time to ask questions that don’t have clear answers. It’s the time to get creative. It’s the time to take risks. It’s time to see what emerges.
If you are in a neutral zone of your own, or if you are heading into a change and know you will eventually encounter it, remember that it’s okay to feel a bit lost during that in-between time. Click here for some more ideas about how to make the most of the neutral zone.
And if you are contemplating a change, but feeling a bit stuck or unclear, you may be interested in my “What’s Next?” group coaching program.
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